Sargent Major was the first of Grandmama's illegitimate children (Sargent wasn't actually conceived out of wedlock, but during the little-known coital prohibition period in Arkansas in 1900). The true definition of an accident, Sargent was born to Grandmama late in 1901. No one remembers which month. The family was so poor, they could afford a calendar.
He led an uneventful life, growing in obscurity in his own house. America went to war in 1914 and Sargent was determined to do his part, enrolling when he turned 18. Unfortunately for him, the war had ended a year earlier. Desperate for a better life, he pleaded with Army recruiters, who relented and sent him to work on a security detail on a bridge in Molvania . Corporal Sargent Major left for Molvania in 1919 and was never seen again.